Florida Man’s Unique Daily “Quota” As A Personal Shopper Lands Him Behind Bars
Our word for the day, boys and girls, is “quota.” We all have them, and that apparently includes Florida Man, even if his involves a rather bizarre crime spree. In…
Our word for the day, boys and girls, is "quota." We all have them, and that apparently includes Florida Man, even if his involves a rather bizarre crime spree.
In this case, we have a case of Florida Man performing what some would call a service - that of a personal shopper.
The difference, of course, is that when it comes to Florida Man, he's likely to find himself in trouble with the law.
FLORIDA MAN STRIKES AGAIN!
DATELINE - Martin County and the Saga of Florida Man Fabio Fonseca.
You probably have quotas that you have to meet at work. No matter what your job is. You have deadlines, certain things that you have to do.
Well, Fonseca was arrested a few days ago on retail theft and felony drug charges. When he was arrested, Fonseca told deputies that he had to meet his daily quota - a "$300 daily theft quota" is what he told the police.
So he began to take orders from people who were willing to buy stolen items, and he traveled across county lines to do so.
Among some of the items pilfered, beauty products, toys, suitcases, an air fryer, toiletries, clothes, and Squishmallows.
As we mentioned, he was arrested on drug charges because, well, drugs were also found in his possession.
I'm not sure if he was working for someone else who was giving him this quota of $300 a day. Maybe he just made it up on the spot because he thought it sounded good.
During his county to county trek, Fonseca was making his way through Martin County, where he was ultimately nabbed by deputies. He was described as "a traveling secret retail thief" by the Martin County Sheriff's Office since he would walk into local retail stores and act like a superstar secret shopper.
It's a whole new business industry right there for you.
Fonseca arrested on grand retail theft and drug possession charges.
Top 5 “Florida Man Strikes Again” Stories For September 2023
Each month, Florida Man seems determined to top his antics from the previous 30 days.
And somehow, he manages to succeed.
In the month of September, transportation appeared to be trending in the Sunshine State - stolen cars, torched vehicles, hamster wheels - you name it!
Getting robbed and arrested all in a matter of a few minutes? That seems like quite the feat.
Until you remember that it's Florida Man we're talking about.
And then there's assault with a deadly lollipop.
What's your favorite Florida Man story from September?
Florida Man Would Have Been Far Better Off Just Eating the Lollipop
Who doesn’t love lollipops? We’re pretty sure that Florida Man can be counted in the “yes” category when they’re being passed out.
You go to the bank, and there they are at the counter. Oh sure, they’re supposed to be for the kids but you know you’ve taken one (or two) for yourself.
Leave it to Florida Man to use a lollipop as a weapon.
Only Florida Man Would Steal A Rolls Royce and Then Rent It Out
This might be one of our all-time favorite Florida Man stories.
There are only a handful of Rolls Royce Wraiths painted in this particular shade of purple. So what does Florida Man do when he steals it?
He posts it for rent on social media.
Florida Man Gets Robbed And Arrested All In the Same Day
Florida Man possesses some very unique traits. For example, how many people can claim they were robbed, call the police to report the theft, and then end up arrested?
Jealous Florida Man Carries A Torch For Both His Girlfriend and Her Jaguar XE
When a jealous Florida Man carries a figurative torch for his girlfriend, and a literal one for her Jaguar SE, you just KNOW you have a hot story on your hands.
Florida Man and His Giant Hamster Wheel Go For the Grand Slam
There’s nothing like having a hobby. In the case of Florida Man, it’s gone from a giant hamster wheel hobby to an obsession worthy of a grand slam.
Now, if this story sounds familiar, well, it should because this is not the first time Baluchi has attempted this.
There were similar stunts in 2014, 2016, and in 2021 which we had told you about in a previous episode of Florida Man Strikes Again.
All of those episodes have ended with Coast Guard intervention.
