Florida Man, A Golf Cart, and Alcohol Is NOT A Good Combination
Of all the things that Florida Man can do, combining a golf cart and alcohol is probably not a good combination. FLORIDA MAN STRIKES AGAIN! DATELINE – Key West and…
Of all the things that Florida Man can do, combining a golf cart and alcohol is probably not a good combination.
FLORIDA MAN STRIKES AGAIN!
DATELINE - Key West and the Saga of Florida Man James Riley Jackson.
When I was a little kid, my dad would tell me these stories about cars and guys who owned them, and I loved the way he told these stories. He went into such detail. I could see the chrome shining with the way he would tell these stories, because he talked about guys who took care of their cars, and there were those guys who didn't.
I have a feeling that that may be part of what's going on with today's Florida Man story.
It seems that Florida Man Jackson was pulled over on DUI charges on US 1, found with bottles of alcohol - both opened and unopened - when police got to him. But as is always the case with Florida Man, there's more.
Because Jackson was driving a stolen golf cart on US 1.
I'll make the connection between the stories my dad told me about the cars and the golf cart in a second.
Apparently, there were reports of a drunken golf cart driver leaving a Shell gas station a couple of days ago. Well, the Monroe County sheriff's office responded, finding Jackson, as we said, with the bottles of alcohol in that golf cart, which supposedly belonged to the Key West Golf Club.
And here's the connection.
The guy didn't take care of it. The golf cart's roof dented and bent with a portion of the windshield missing and the front wheels damaged. If my dad had told me this story when I was a little kid, I would have been heartbroken. How could you do that to a golf cart?
At any rate, Key West Police Department investigating reports of earlier damage done to the Key West Golf Club course, probably by that stolen golf cart and probably - allegedly, of course - with Florida Man Jackson in it.
Jackson, by the way, taken to jail, charged with DUI, larceny, vehicle theft, criminal mischief, property damage. Oh, did we mention that he was underage? Possession of alcohol while underage and possession of a fake ID, according to the Monroe County Sheriff's Office.
Shame on Florida Man. That golf cart deserved a lot better.
Top 5 “Florida Man Strikes Again” Stories For August 2023
The month of August was pretty wild for Florida Man.
Oh sure, there were the usual drunken adventures and mishaps. And impersonating a police officer, well that's definitely nothing new for Florida Man.
What surprised us was the location Florida Man chose for some of his antics - like church - and his inclusion of Mom a couple of times.
Even for non-believers, there has to be at least a little concern of "What if..." when you decide to commit any kind of crime in a church or house of worship.
After all, there are so many other places to find victims these days.
Although we will admit that the attempt at salvation via baptism while in the act of vandalizing a church puts a different sort of twist on things.
And when it comes to dealing with Mom....
Look, you can get any member of the family you want angry at you. But Mom?
Come on, Florida Man. You can do better than that.
Florida Man Arrested While Trying To Get INTO A Police Car To Threaten Someone
The month of August started off with one of the more bizarre Florida Man stories we've seen in awhile.
Florida Man has spent a lot of time in police cars, but this might have been the first time he actively tried to get into one.
You See A Church Congregation, Florida Man Sees Victims For His Next Fraud
Florida Man seemed to spend a lot of time in church during the month of August.
In this first instance, Florida Man saw a lot of targets for his investment scam.
Florida Man Looks For Some Heavenly Salvation In the Middle of A Burglary
Back to church for Florida Man!
This time, he decided that maybe salvation could be found while committing a crime if he took a dip in the sanctuary baptismal pool.
And why not have a K-9 officer join in too?
Florida Man’s Mom Is Not Going To Be Happy About What He Told the Police
In addition to being in church, Florida Man spent a lot of time with Mom during the month of August.
Somehow, blaming Mom for her being the one who gave you a container that contained drug residue in it is not going to warm her heart.
Florida Man Adds Dear Old Mom To His Multimillion-Dollar Theft Ring
It looks as if Florida Man REALLY wants to get the family together in his ring of theft – even Dear Old Mom.
This time, Florida Man didn’t even have to throw her under the bus; she was along with him on the bus ride.
